Butterfaces

I know you all have seen these freaks of nature somewhere before. Guys, I know you've made the mistake of trying to get at them too, because of the monster ass attached. They are some of the worse women (?) in the world, because you're emotionally torn. On the one hand, you see a hot body that makes your dick harder than the SAT's, but your feet keep getting this urge to propel your body away in the other direction of this mistake of nature. Here's a typical scenario:

He sees the most absolutely round, squishy, softest-looking bubblebutt ever, and his dick gets him to thinking, "I need to fuck this bitch tonight". He starts to salivate, formulating an idea of what would be just the right thing to say to it (not the female; he hasn't seen her face yet) upon introduction. I should also mention he's also drunk off his ass. So when he approaches her, staggering as he goes she turns around and he sees in all her (drunken) unabashed ugliness, but doesn't think of her that way, because he's toasted, and is blinded by the ass he sees.

Exhibit A:



The only ways people would have sex with ugly females short of being insane...

Anyway, now his dick takes over; somehow the conversation turns to sex, he says he's this size and the "Butter" (face) gets to thinking she's gonna try him out. They head and go back to her cave and make hot sweaty monkey love, complete with the jungle sounds. He busts a terrible nut; he immediately decides he fucked up because of that wonderful ass, and decides to take off, but by now, ol' butters is in love with him because of how he waxed that ass. He's fucked now... he knows his boys are gonna laugh at him when he tells them, after which they ask if they can smash also.

Ladies, I know you've seen these females that look like a hot piece of "ohh-hell-fuckin'-nah!!" pushing around a baby carriage in the mall or wherever and you get to thinking, "WTF is this shit?!" and you want to ask her "Who the fuck been layin' with your ugly ass?!"; I know, because that's exactly what I think when I see it. Remember the old Jordan commercial "it's gotta be the shoes!"? Well, it's gotta be the head game, because her looks are...kinda bad...

The funny shit about it is these girls are uglier than God should allow to stalk this planet, and dudes will gas these creatures' heads up, again because of their obscenely large asses or the fact that they're truly TITanic (and/or both) and they'll go around being their disgusting, gruesome selves like they're finer than angel hair. They'll carry an inner ugliness (conceited personality) to match their outer ugliness. Many of them make it in porn, because they're not "movie screen" or "TV" attractive. I'm like "how you get to thinkin' you're hotter than Keyshia Cole? Some body done lied to you, seriously!"

Exhibit B:



Does this qualify as wifey material?

Fellas, are lookin' at her or are you staring directly into the ass when you say you like her? Quit gassing these monsters up, making them think they can mix with regular soceity like everybody else! As for me, I've seen better...